When attending my first AA meetings years ago, some of the women really made lasting impressions on me, imprinting on my memory and soul forever. Their caring. Their service—showing up for me.
The first two women who ever came up to me are still my friends, 6,292 days later (over 17-years.) One came up to me at my first meeting, when I announced that I was a newcomer and said, “welcome” and shoved a bagel in my face. The other handed me her phone number. I still have that little piece of paper with her name and number. Two beautiful, sober, women reaching out.
Another woman used to give the best hugs. It was no “drive-by hug”— simple, quick and on your way—but a long, tight, hug that was full of love. Not letting go for the longest time. She was a woman of few words, but her hugs said it all to me. “I am here for you.”
I felt safe.
I used to look for her at meetings just to get that hug. I try to give those kind of hugs now. It means so much, especially now, since we have practiced isolation and distancing over the last year and a half. Connection means everything. Eye contact. Long bear hugs. Talking face-to-face. This keeps me sober and coming back. My people. My tribe.
When the pandemic hit, I was very worried about newly sober people who needed us. Needed someone to be with, to hold onto, talk to, hug, see their welcome smile. I didn’t think anyone would—or could—get sober on Zoom.
Well, I was wrong.
If we are ready, we find a way. I hosted many meetings on Zoom and saw some come to our online meetings for the first time and hear us talk and support each other. Even if we were in boxes on a screen. Then, when we could meet in person again, I was there to give them the big, long hug they were needing.
Not just a drive-by-hug.
A long, meaningful hug.
Connection.
I needed it too.
“…Love one another. As I have loved you.”
John 13:34
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