For years, I looked at drinking as a way to take myself a notch down, relax, not have a care. Not deal with the things in my life that troubled me. It felt like I could think better and it made me feel like I had greater access to creativity—the artist in me. Drugs and alcohol made me “more of me.” (LOL)
This could not be further from truth.
As my drinking progressed, my thinking became more fuzzy. My perspective more skewed. My behaviors inconsistent with what I knew was right. All of that thinking was Ego—self-centered fear. In reality, drinking and drugs took me further away from me. And, it was separation from God. I heard a guy in meeting share the other day, “I may not be much, but I’m all I think about.”—Self. Ego.
E.G.O.—Edging God Out.
How did I stop my addictive behaviors?
1) I took the first step of surrender. I had to acknowledge I was powerless over my addiction, and quite frankly, everything in my life.
2) Then I came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity if I sought Him.
3) Then I turned my will over to God.
Then, I could begin the healing process of reviewing long-rehearsed behaviors in my life that kept me stuck—stalled from moving forward again into purpose. I surrendered that strong hold I had on the crutch that I thought I needed. When I did that, I realized the strong hold it had on me. I could turn to God and ask for help.
I connected with others who knew the way up and out. They showed me how to show up to meetings and then get out of my own way to be available to be used by God to serve others again. Purpose.
When I let go of this false “wall of protection” called alcohol and drugs, I surrendered to God in humility. I was able to access the source of power and to not be separated from that gift of light. That light of hope that motivates me to come out of myself and think about others. To be the person God meant for me to be. To look at this life through a new lens. A new pair of glasses, through which I can view the world.
A New Perspective.
Step into the light today.
Show up for life again.
If I can do it, so can you.
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Romans 12:2
Click on my books below to buy.
