More parties. More drinking. More expectations. More disappointments. More invitations—no invitations. More family challenges. Loss. Death. Loved ones dead and gone. Memories of the past—bad and good. More photos on social media of “perfect lives”—
More of everything.
Just a little bit crazy. For us all—in every possible way. And, especially for alcoholics and addicts. This time of year is usually already crazy with anxiety and stress for people who are trying to maintain their sobriety—just being around friends and relatives who are celebrating with lots of drinking (and drugging.)
When I found alcohol, I found more of ME. More fun. More is better, right? Except when more became never enough. How much was enough? Two drinks? Six? Ten? Until I passed out? Apparently that was enough.
Addiction is the disease of more—of never enough. I was chasing that high forever after that first rush. Alcohol freed me from my fears in the world. Until it didn’t. Enough was when I came to the end of me. I asked God for help and He gave it. Then, God freed me from the fears of this world.
Today—I get to ask Him again tomorrow.
When I got sober, I didn’t have the crutch of alcohol anymore, I had to seek other behaviors that supported my sobriety. Going to meetings and talking with others like myself—hearing God talk to me through the victories they share. Praying for God’s will in my life. Helping others and getting out of my own head and thinking. I focus on gratitude. What I do have. I try and help others like myself. I practice self care (which is not selfish, by the way.) If I don’t take care of me first, I am not going to be available for others. How can I be of service to others if I am drunk, isolated or I don’t show up?
I don’t have to be in a drinking setting, especially when I am feeling vulnerable. I can go to the party for a while and then leave when the crazy ramps up. It starts to get a little easier each day I continue on the path of sobriety. Nobody ever said, “Stop drinking and all of your problems will go away.”
Hardly.
In fact, I have experienced harder things in sobriety. The difference now is that with the alcohol out of my way, my head is clearer so I can make better choices and respond to things that happen in a more informed way. Alcohol was “separation from God” for me. Now, I can partner with God and face everything I need to with confidence and peace, knowing God is right there with me.
This life is not easy, but, now I have the tools to walk peacefully in this world and shine God’s light for others.
I hope I see you in a meeting.
I want to hear God speak to me—through your story!
I need you.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33
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