When I do this, I’ll be happy.
When this happens, I will...
When I get to this point, I...
Wow. When we start the sentence with this phrase, it implies we aren’t content with where we are right now. I am guilty of this. Death is a reminder that we need to live each day in the present and as if it’s our last day.
A friend, sober 26-years, died this last weekend. He went quickly. I am sad, but it’s how I want to go too—Quickly. Don’t we all?
Death took me to my bottom of my drinking, but now, in sobriety, death doesn’t have to take me out. I have all of the tools I need to stay sober in my sadness and feel the feelings—go to a meeting and share with others who are feeling those feelings too.
Last Monday, my friend was sitting right behind me in the meeting we attend together. I reached back to hold his hand for a moment in acknowledgment that he was there. It was what we call a chip meeting—where we give each other coins for various lengths of sobriety—He was getting his 26-year coin. I got to hand him his coin and hug him. After you get your coin, you pass it around the room for people to hold and bless. It usually comes back to the person. After the meeting, the last words I heard from him were, “My coin didn’t come back around the circle...oh, well, somebody must have needed it more than I did.”
The next week he was gone.
He didn’t need that coin where he was going. Someone else needed that coin to carry them. That’s how this program works. Last year, when he got his 25-year coin, he gave it to our Pastor. We freely give away what was so freely given to us—GRACE. In sobriety, we are given a chance to show up for others now that we are sober and free.
This man had many physical and medical struggles, but he persevered and showed up to share his experience, strength and hope with our group over the years. I have heard him share in meetings so many times and it gave me hope. One of the things he always said came from the first three steps of the 12 steps, distilled into three short sentences—
“I can’t. He can. I think I’ll let Him.” One. Two. Three.
Today I have hope because of another sober brother.
You can too. If not now, then when?
I choose to live today, content that I have one more sober day to live and serve.
You?
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
James 1:2-4
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